Roy Jordan and Ed Morgan


The classic urban-coastal-leftie-meets-salt-of-earth tale, this one from the 90s, revisited with award-winning Turkish spoon maestro Sedat Uysal joining in at his Café Paloma, Seattle, May 2019.

Roy Jordan and Ed Morgan were two good old boys from my home town
They were good boys, not so old boys
You really couldn’t say they’d been around
When it came to race, creed, color, gender orientation and endangered species
I guess you really couldn’t say they’d made the scene
In fact they were liable to escort you to the edge of town
For wearin the wrong color jeans
One night down at the bar they chanced to meet
A representative from some subcommittee of the U.N.
Who introduced them to a couple of her friends,
took em on a trip around the world, and later on brought em back again.

Roy Jordan and Ed Morgan moved into two houses down the road
Just to the left and right of mine but I don’t mind
Long as they keep it up to code
Roy Jordan and Ed Morgan had no sooner gotten out of bed
Than there were three blonde Moslems, two Peruvian PhD’s
And funny ideas gettin into their heads

Roy Jordan and Ed Morgan went down to the corner store
Roy Jordan and Ed Morgan really couldn’t know what was in store
Cause there there was a Micronesian workin on a macroprogram
For a list of all the famous gays in history when suddenly a space ship came on by
And took em to another planet where there was no corner store
And they really had to wonder why

Well there was no corners cause there was no straight streets
and no straight people, well maybe just a few
And I guess you’d have to say they were treated rather well

And there was Ilhan Omar & AOC & Colin Kaepernick & and Chelsea Manning

and Black Jews and even Arab comedians too

And then Jesus came along and he was a Rubenesque black lesbian
And they really didn’t know what to do

Roy Jordan and Ed Morgan were two good old boys from my home town
They were good boys, gettin to be old boys
I guess you could say they were gettin around
One night down at the bar they chanced to meet
A man who was just this far short of bein’ a mensch
Who thought he knew whereof he spew
So Roy said boy, get a dimension!
So one night down at the bar if you chance to meet a man
Who’s fit to be fenced
Tell him you’re married to a gay Black Jewish Puerto Rican
And see if he can figure out which part he’s against