What with all the generals ascending to civilian offices they don’t belong in, here’s a general you could bring home to dinner. These are his own words.
Got a little story, kinda gory, you’ll be glad when I am through
I admit it was a sin, take only two minutes to vent
120 seconds, and I reckon it’ll be well-spent
I spent 33 years and 4 months in active military service
In this country’s most agile military force, the Marines
I served in all commissioned ranks from 2nd Lieutenant to Major-General
And all the while I spent most of my time in sordid scenes
Being a high-class muscle-man for Big Business, for Wall Street, and for the Bankers
I don’t say this out of any kind of perverse egotism
But in short, I was a racketeer, a gangster for capitalism
I helped make Mexico, especially Tampico, safe for American oil interests in 1914
I helped make Haiti, and Cuba, decent for the National City Bank boys to
collect revenues, I helped
purify Nicaragua for the banking house of Brown Brothers in 1909
I brought light to the Dominican Republic for American sugar interests in 1916
In China I helped Standard Oil say hey, it’s all mine
During those years, I had, as the boys in the back room say, a swell racket
Looking back at it, I could have given Al Capone some hints how to attack it
The best he could do was operate in three districts, not so immense
I operated on three continents