Singing CIA Agent George Shrub on the Meddle East—Part 1


From 1983 to 2008, and occasionally beyond, George Shrub, the world’s only known singing CIA agent, pontificated in song, dance, and fake news on his methods of keeping our world Our World. The Problem of Palestine was a recurrent theme. Here, from the archives, he rises again to the challenge of explaining settler colonialism away.

But, Hamas!


No matter what atrocities you detail, the Pundits For Genocide have only the one non-response. My response to their non-response is longer, and rhymes, sort of.

What would you do if I took all your land
While pretending I’m defending myself?
Look at that bird, oh look, I’ve got your house!
I don’t care that you’ve still got the key
I apartheid with a little help from my friends
Bombs and tanks are a little help from my friends

But Hamas, But Hamas, Hamas Hamas
But Hamas, But Hamas, Hamas Hamas
Before their attack they lived first class
But Hamas, Hamas, Hamas

Would you believe in denial of rights
Yes I’m certain that it happens all the time
What does the conqueror see through his sights
I can’t tell you but I know It’s mine
Oh I get by by evicting the folks
While the White House gives me the okey-doke

76 years of dispossession brings
110 brigades of terror squads
They were followed by rows and rows
Of ethnic cleansing virtuosos
The cream of the settler colonial band

There were 50 mounted cannon in the battery
Thundering, plundering more than e’er before
Terror gangs of every size, destruction they would improvise
Razing villages by the score

Mow, mow, mow the lawn,
Put them on a diet
No travel rights, no right to fish
A perfect petri dish
(for the development of repressive technologies to export to other countries that wish to control and immiserate their minorities, or majorities for that matter)

Palestinians are indigenous
And the media gives a hint
Don’t say genocide, don’t say Palestine
That’s not news that’s fit to print

In fact this is a US occupation—US bucks
US bombs and UN vetoes, Brooklyn settlers, what the fuck
From the river to the sea is Israel’s reality, Look ma, no Palestine.

Uprooting olive trees, replaced with pine trees
Make desert bloom — have you ever heard such sleaze
Taking of hostages, clearly a crime
Freeing 7 million of them would be one of my favorite things
Refugee camps are reservations, it’s the same old game
Yes US and Israel are conquering land thieves
And that’s why I feel so bad
CHO
Which in Spanish means Never Again.

Your Genocide, It Must Be Ending


That great old song was about due for an update.

Come gather round people
Enraged by this slaughter
And admit you’d act fast
To save your son and daughter
And accept it that we’ve been
Denying food and water
If all life to you is worth savin’
Then you better stand up
For humanity now
This genocide, it must be ending

Come senators, Congressman
What the actual hell
For human rights
You’re not doing so well
Seems like you don’t get it
Though it’s clear as a bell
The atrocities Israel is wagin’
Are a stain on your name
And legacy, truth to tell
Your genocide, it must be ending

What kind of democracy murders a nation
What kind of human being
sponsors starvation
Come cut off the funds
from this colonization
Your old order is rapidly fadin’
Dispossession, apartheid,
ethnic cleansing must cease
And your genocide, it must be ending

Leave It Blank


Following the significant showings of “uncommitted” voters in Democratic primaries in several states, anti-genocide campaigners in New York are urging voters to leave the Presidential line blank. Here’s why.

When I find myself in times of voting
Gaza’s people come to me
Suffering starvation
Bombs and tanks
The White House sends the weapons
The White House must atone for this
First line of your ballot
Leave it blank

Let’s be frank, Biden sank
I’m not a crank, my vote you need
There will be a ballot
Leave it blank

And when the broken hearted people
living in the world agree
Biden’s sense of justice is absentee
And though the White House funds it
There is still a chance that they will see
If they’re isolated
Leave it blank

Let’s be frank, Biden sank
I’m not a crank, my vote you need
There will be a ballot
Leave it blank

So break ranks, say no thanks
No more tanks for genocide
There will be a ballot
Leave it blank

And in our hour of slaughter
food and water aren’t allowed to them
One thing we can offer
Leave it blank
And in our hour of voting
There is still a chance to say our piece
There will be a ballot
Leave it blank

Let’s be frank, your morals sank
I’m not a crank, my vote you need
There will be a ballot
Leave it blank

So break ranks, say no thanks
No more tanks for genocide
There will be a ballot
Leave it blank

Tone It Down


Tony Blinken actually asked Qatar to tell al Jazeera to tone down their coverage of genocide in Gaza.

When I find myself at al Jazeera
Tony Blinken comes to me
Counseling more silence
Tone it down
And in our hour of bombing he is calming
As he comes to me
Speaking words of conquest
Tone it down

And when the broken hearted people
living in the world agree
There must be ceasefire, let it be
And though the Congress funds it
There is still a chance that they will see
If they’re isolated, Let it be

But tone it down, turn that frown,
Upside down, Let’s break it down
How can we kill Gazans
If people see?

And when William Lloyd Garrison
Reported news of slavery
Lincoln (not A. Blinken)
Said tone it down
He pleaded “be more mellow, dude”
You’re histrionic, now we’re screwed
Here’s my words of cowardice
Tone it down

Tone it down, please sit down,
nervous breakdown’s not what we need
Slaves will get their freedom
By degrees

And when the genocide of Cheney
In Iraq was videoed
Every President said
Tone it down
Assange will rot in prison
Cause he showed what Manning stole from me
Whisper words of murder, tone it down

Tone it down, turn that frown,
Upside down, Let’s break it down
How can we kill Gazans
If people see?

Apartheid, Ciao


Ethnic cleansing and dispossession never happened in Palestine, right? And it’s not happening now, right?

We’ve got to wake up
We’ve got to wise up
We’ve got to boycott apartheid
Now now now
We’ve got to build a better future
To fight for freedom this we vow

You’re occupying and always lying
Apartheid is but a step
to your final goal
Ethnic cleansing and dispossession
You’re destroying Palestine

Uprooting orchards, displacing farmers
Yes you tore it all down
and you lied lied lied
Israeli conquest is what we protest
US enabling genocide

So let’s all wake up
The truth let’s take up
No more stealing of water
and land and rights
We’re gonna build a better future
And we’re gonna start right now